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Wise Decisions, Part II- The Fall

We live on a path.  And sometimes we choose to step off of this path.
Out of curiosity, maybe rebellion, or because the grass seems greener over there.  Without any marked trail to follow we misstep, stumble, and fall.  That’s okay, as long as we get back up, and realize that we should probably follow our bread crumb trail back to the path. 

But sometimes we fall in holes. Or pits.

Those falls are hard, and fast.  And the pits are deep, dark, and cold.  All our strength is gone from trudging through the wilderness so we’re tired and weak. And we want to just lay there for a while on the nice cold ground. A break from searching. A break from walking. Then, once we start to feel the pain of our broken bones, and the hardness of the ground, we wonder how we got there in the first place. It seems like we just took a brief scenic route, so how did it lead here?

It never takes too long to lose yourself. And you don’t realize you’ve wandered…until you’re lost.  Until you’re lying, broken, on the cold concrete floor of that deep pit, do you realize the steps you took to get there. 

And so you start to climb out, ironically, healing on the way.  And it takes a while.  But it’s worth it. Because once your face is warmed again by the sun, and your weary feet touch the soft green grass, you’ll look back and be grateful.  Grateful for what you learned and grateful for the grace you were given to climb out. 

You Are More than that misstep. 

No one said getting out of the hole was going to be easy, but there are people who can help you begin the climb.  Call Hope for help,  435.652.8343


Post provided by Love and Learn blog.

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Wise Decisions Part I- Time to reflect

We make choices, without realizing in that moment how much they affect the rest of our lives. And if we thought a little longer about the outcome, weighed the pros and cons, considered the pain, imagined our future, where would we be? Would we have made the same choice? And if those choices hadn’t been made, would fate take over and make that choice for us anyway ? The choices we make reflect the person we are, and the person we’re becoming. The choices we make affect so much more than we can see. It’s a butterfly effect of chain reactions for all eternity. We look back at the big decisions, the small decisions, the bad ones and the good ones. And we may laugh. Or cry. Depending on how much time has passed. And we can’t help but wonder, what if?

Sometimes there’s no possible way of predicting the outcome and we have to dive in head first to find out. Sometimes the outcome is clear. Sometimes the outcome is obviously bad, but we choose it anyway. Sometimes the outcome is obviously good, so we take advantage of it. Sometimes, we ignore the outcome completely, and make blind decisions based on what we want now. Those are the worst kind. Though they may bring temporary happiness, it always ends. Sometimes, when it does end, we still can’t admit to ourselves that it was a bad decision, therefore preventing us from learning. Therefore causing us to make the same decision again. And again. Until we just don’t care anymore. These choices we make may push people out of our lives that we never wanted out, they may change our plans, they may break our hearts, they may cause some unwanted drama, but what if that’s the point of it all? What if our potential is in the way we rise from the mess we’ve made? What if beauty hides in the unwanted change of direction?  

If you want to talk, we are here for you.  Call Hope at 435 652-8343.
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Fools rush in…

Oh how I wish that expression read, “Wisdom rushes in…”.  In this fast paced world, we want answers now.  In fact, if we are really honest, we want answers yesterday!  However, good answers are usually never instant.  Those decisions we make out of impatience usually do not represent our finest moments.  As the expression reads, “only fools rush in.”  In other words, our wisest decisions usually come with some time. They are never rushed or arrived at hastily.  They are mulled over, tested, digested and then finally, they come to be.  Please be encouraged- if you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and don’t know exactly what you want to do, it is ok.  In fact, taking some time to figure it out could even be called wise.

There are some options before you, and despite what others may say, none of them require an immediate decision.  Please give yourself the benefit of time.  Learn about the options that interest you most- ask good questions, talk to your loved ones, and then, sit on your decision for a bit of time so you know it’s one you feel is best for you and those involved.  We are here to help during this process.  We will never rush you and you can come back to Hope as many times as you need.  Call us at 652-8343 to make an appointment.  You Are More than a fool.
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I’m pregnant and afraid

The clients that visit Hope are sometimes overwhelmed with fear.   They are afraid of sharing the news with loved ones.  They are afraid of what people might think.  They are afraid of what the future holds.  They are afraid of disappointing others.  They are afraid that there is no one around to help. They are afraid of what pregnancy might be like. The list goes on and on and I am sure you can fill in the blank very easily with your own sources of fear.

Fear is a normal response to an unplanned pregnancy.  When we experience a difficult situation and are limited in who we can go to for help, we often bottle up all of our emotions.  We are walking around like a shaken up soda bottle that needs to release the pressure inside but just can’t.  This is why Hope exists.  You do not have to go through these hard things alone.  We are here to gently remove the cap on that shaken up soda bottle so you can release the pressure and begin to sort through your feelings and fears in a safe, confidential atmosphere.

A wise man once said, “Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” You may be in a place where that idea seems almost ridiculous, but with our experience, it is true. There may not be immediate relief from fear or sadness, but with time and perseverence, you can experience hope and joy. 

We would love to walk that road with you and share the reasons for our hope.  You are More than your fears.  Call us for an appointment at (435) 652-8343.
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Abortion won’t affect me…or will it?

I was recently made aware of a celebrity’s comment that when she was 16 abortion was her only choice and decades later she says she has no regrets because it was the best thing for her. I considered what she had to say and, to be honest, I was troubled by the fact that she made it sound so simple.  Although the celebrity was giving her personal opinion, that opinion could lead women astray from the seriousness of the aboriton decision. It is not to be taken lightly. 

At Hope, we take abortion seriously. It is an option in an unplanned pregnancy, but can carry serious consequences that need to be considered.  From our experience with women who have had an abortion, it is a decision that most of them wish they had taken more time to learn about and consider in light of other options. At Hope, we provide complete information about abortion (to include the types of procedures, the development of the fetus, and the physical and emotional risks to the mother) and allow you the time you need to make an informed choice you can feel good about.

If you or someone you know is considering abortion, please don’t just take a celebrity’s opinion or allow yourself to believe it’s a quick fix, but find a place that can give you medically accurate information in a caring, no pressure environment.  If you or somoeone you know is thinking about an abortion, please call us at (435) 652-8343.  Take your time and learn as much as possible because the decisions you make today do impact your physical and emotional health in the future.

Don’t allow pop culture to define your beliefs or make your decisions for you because… You Are More.
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What happens when I’m pregnant?

Let’s say you already know you are pregnant. You are wondering about that little being inside you…what exactly is it doing? Well, this entry is just for you. Below is information about the day of conception through the first 6 weeks after conception.

Conception Day- The egg and sperm most often unite in the fallopian tube to form a single cell called a zygote. This tiny new cell contains all the genetic information for every detail of the new life- color of the hair and eyes, the intricate fine lines of the fingerprint, the physical appearance, the gender, the height and skin tone.

Days 3-4- This life is now called an embryo and arrives at the uterus where the lining of the uterus is preparing to receive it.

1 week- The embryo begins to implant in the lining of the uterus. Hormones trigger the mother’s body to nurture the pregnancy and stop her monthly period.

2 weeks- A pregnancy test can measure the hCG hormone in the mother’s urine to tell her if she is pregnant. The embryo is attached, drawing nourishment from its mother.

3 weeks- The heart, about the size of a poppy seed, is the first organ to function. The first signs of brain development are evident, and the foundation for every organ system is already established and begin to develop.

4 weeks- The eyes are developing, and the arm and leg buds are visible. The beating heart can be seen on an ultrasound.

5 weeks- Depending on the baby’s gender, the testicles or ovaries are beginning to form.

6 weeks- The baby is ½ of an inch long. Elbows and fingers can be seen. Lungs begin developing and taste buds from on the tongue.

If you want more information about the stages of development or want to take a free pregnancy test to know if you are pregnant, call us anytime at 652-8343.

Hope PCC is a non-medical facility that shares with women and men accurate information about fetal development, as well as their options. The information provided above comes from the brochure, The First 9 Months, developed by Focus on the Family and approved by the Physicians Research Council.
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Just For Him

We realize that an unplanned pregnancy doesn’t just happen to her… as the father, you also have decisions to make. Sometimes it’s hard to know how to help or be involved. You deserve to be heard and we want to help you express your thoughts in a way that will help and not hurt.

Do:
1) Listen. You have a lot going through your mind, but so does she. Take time to listen without offering solutions. Decisions and details do not have to be made or figured out today or even tomorrow, so don’t rush her. Allow time to bring clarity of thought.
2) Stay calm. She needs your support. Even though she is carrying the baby, you are BOTH parents. The decisions you make will affect the future of all three of you. Do nothing out of fear or selfish reasons, stay calm and think about what is best for everyone.
3) Talk about it- not only with her. Prepare yourself to talk to those closest to you- parents, trustworthy adults, and loyal friends. Hiding secrets from those who can genuinely help will only increase your stress.
4) Gather all of the facts. You will hear lots of advice so make sure to weigh that advice against accurate information. A good decision will make sense not only in your head, but also in your heart.
5) Express yourself honestly. You deserve to be heard as well. Make sure to express your fears, frustrations, and anger but do it with love and respect. Remember this comes after you’ve listened to her and let her know you care.

Don’ts:
1) Don’t let your emotions get the best of you. Running away or yelling only make things harder. Man up and stick around.
2) Don’t pressure her. Too much pressure will only push her away and might cause her to make a decision she would later regret. Never manipulate. Do your best to work together and take your time.
3) Don’t forget your role. You have an active part to play…listen, comfort, seek advice, provide your thoughts.

We have men available to talk to you and help with accurate information about your options. They are hear simply to listen to you and help you sort things out. You Are More than a silent bystander. Call us at 652-8343.
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Too Much Advice?

Well, it’s been awhile since we’ve chatted and I’ve had a particular situation on my mind. It’s a pretty serious topic, but aren’t they all when we consider the topic of unplanned pregnancies? Here’s the scenario: You’re pregnant and beginning to confide in those closest to you- seeking advice and desiring help to figure out what you are going to do.

There are those people, in particular, whose opinion means more to you than others. They are the ones that love you and care for you and have a vested interest in your decision. In an effort to please those you love, you may be considering an abortion simply because a person you care about thinks its best (even though you are not convinced it’s right for you.)

We understand the pressure you feel must be enormous- so many opinions and so much advice. We don’t want to add to the many voices, instead we hope to clarify your decision-making and empower you to do what you feel is right.

No matter your age, even if you are a minor, no one can legally force you or coerce you to have an abortion.

What might this look like? A parent may say something like, “You are my child and you need to do what I say. ” Or the father of the baby may say, “You have to have an abortion because I’m not ready to be a dad.” The Supreme Court has been very clear on the subject. It is unlawful for your parents, relatives, or boyfriend to unduly pressure, force or coerce you into having an abortion. They could even be subject to potential criminal charges of child abuse or fetal homicide.

Your family does not have to support your child financially but they do have to support you. Additionally, you have the right to receive child support from the father of your child. You have rights and the freedom to do what you feel is best is one of those rights.

So, bottom line? Continue to seek out what is best for you.  Get accurate information and take your time. This is a huge decision and, in the end, the decision is ultimately your own- you have to live with the consequences.

You Are More than a puppet.  So, figure it out and then stand up for yourself. We have documents that can help you express your rights if you are being pressured. Call us at 652-8343.

We are not attorneys and do not dispense legal advice. The legal information contained in this blog is taken directly from The Justice Foundation’s website (www.thejusticefoundation.org).
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Considering Adoption

You are pregnant and you don’t want to be.  Well, you are not alone.  We exist to support you and help you think through your options.  Adoption is one option that is sometimes not even considered.  Yet, it can be a huge blessing to so many.  Below is a sweet “Recipe for Adoption Success”. You know the reality of placing a child for adoption is not easy. It is a difficult decision and takes a great amount of bravery, maturity and selflessness.  Whenever you put someone else’s needs above our own, you are acting in pure love. If the thought of adoption has even crossed your mind, then know that we at Hope are willing to listen and support you as you work through your feelings. Recipe for Adoption Success 2 cups of conversation, it’s good to talk about your feelings 1 cup of listening to what your inner voice is saying 3 cups of honesty, be honest with yourself 1/2 cup of reality, be clear with your expectations of yourself 1 tsp of help, don’t be afraid to ask for counseling 1 1/4 cup of feelings, yours not your parents or friends 1 cup of journaling, writing down your thoughts 3 cups of understanding, that you will have good days and bad 3 tsp. each of long term goals and support a pinch of grief, it’s normal Adoptive Parents, hand picked by you A Lifetime of Pride, in yourself and your decision Mix together conversation, honesty, help and listening. Fold in reality and support. In a separate bowl mix planning, feelings, journaling, understanding, and grief. Combine the two. Add the long term goals and pride. Pour mixture into baking dish, season for 9 months. Top with love for your child. Although this recipe is sweet and light, we know that adoption is a serious journey and is not decided over night. Remember, the choice is yours. Know the facts, be informed, and take your time to make the very best decision for yourself and baby. We can help get you resources and be there to listen.  Call us at (435) 652-8343.  Recipe provided by So I was Thinking about Adoption by Mardie Caldwell.
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Are You Sexually Active- Part III

Reality check…you can’t completely control, no matter how hard you try, to protect your heart from bonding with the person you’ve chosen to be intimate with. Oxytocin and vasopressin are two chemicals that are released in your body upon intimacy. They are good and serve a wonderful purpose. Oxytocin is the chemical released when a mother nurses her newborn baby- bonds her to that baby for life. Vasopressin is released in dads when they wrestle with their kids- it’s called the “protector” hormone. It makes them want to protect the person he is with. Amazing how our bodies are designed to bond! How great that we are chemically attached to our spouses and children. However, can you see the danger in setting yourself up to bond with multiple people throughout your life? Intimacy triggers these hormones- doctors have studied the brain and the same part of the brain that is stimulated by drug use is stimulated when these hormones release. No wonder you get “addicted” to the people you are intimate with…that’s the design! So, can you see the problem? When a woman decides to be involved intimately “just for fun” or a guy says “it’s no big deal”- WRONG! Things happen in your body that you can’t control. In marriage, it’s a beautiful thing, but outside of marriage it can create attachments to the wrong people and mess with your heart. Re-think your dating plan. Imagine being free of emotional baggage and attachments on your wedding day, giving yourself to the man of your dreams and not looking back. You are worth a fantastic marriage with great sex so have the patience to put it off until it’s the right time. You Are More than a good time. If you have questions or need to talk, call Hope at 652-8343. Scientific reference: “Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love” by Helen Fisher, in The Economist, Feb 2004.
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391 E. 500 S.
St. George, Utah 84770
Client: 435.652.8343
Business: 435.656.5331

Pregnancy Decision Hotline: www.pregnancydecisionline.org

“Hope Pregnancy Care Center does not provide or refer for abortion or contraceptives”.

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